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Sunday, December 14, 2008

Testing Time - Part 2

i lay there and awaited my fate. SG had gone to fetch the hood and i wondered how i had said yes. i knew it was something that i wanted to experience, as well as doing it for Him. i didn't know what to expect or how i was going to feel once i had the hood on. Would i panic straightaway or would i cope?

SG returned with the hood in His hands. He rubbed it gently against my face letting me smell the latex and feel its softness. He asked me if i was ready and if i was sure. i nodded and He told me that once i had the hood on, i should breathe normally and not too quickly, and everything would be alright. my heart was racing in anticipation.

i settled myself and He slowly placed the hood over my head. The soft latex moulded to my face and i could make out the translucent front, although i couldn't see through it. SG ensured the air holes were positioned closely over my mouth. He reminded me to breathe at my normal rate and then began to zip it up at the back. The hood closed in slightly on my head and for a split second, i didn't think i could do it. i took in some air through the holes, followed by another quick breath, making the bag close in against my face. i squirmed for a second as the latex squished against my skin. SG continued to press the air holes to my mouth and told me to keep calm, and i tried to breathe slowly again. i kept telling myself 'i can do this'. i knew the fear was there, never far away, and i tried not to let it take over. i didn't want to have to say my safe word, but i knew i could at any time and SG would stop the scene.

i lay there completely helpless and at His mercy. my life lay in His hands. SG praised me over and over again, and told me how very proud He was. He seemed completely overwhelmed at how i was coping. i could feel Him close by, still ensuring that the air holes were close to my mouth. He asked me if the hood was having any erotic effect on me at all. Was it arousing me? It didn't seem to be. In all honesty, my fear and it being my first ever experience of being hooded, was proving to be far greater than any state of arousal.

SG told me He wanted to quickly take some photos of me, which would mean leaving my side for a few moments. He reassured me it would be OK. He wouldn't be far away. As He went to do this, the presence of the air holes dropped, as He was no longer pressing them to my lips. It felt like the amount of air coming in was diminishing. i breathed in through my nose and the latex closed in on my face again. i was getting a little more scared now and SG was still across the room with the camera. i could hear His voice telling me it was all OK, that He was nearly done and how amazing i looked.

It seemed like forever since He had been by my side. With my body encased in the sleep sack, it was also becoming increasingly hotter inside the catsuit. Coupled with the fact that my head felt so enclosed in the latex hood.

hooded pup
In that moment, i felt so completely alone and i was scared.

"Please come back" said my tiny quivering voice.

All i wanted was to feel Him close by again, to sense He was there by my side. i needed Him. He was back within seconds on hearing my plea and quickly removed the hood. Relief swept over me and emotions ran riot in my head, but i don't remember crying as such. i think i had slighty teary eyes, which didn't turn into anything more than that. Thinking back, it surprises me as i thought i would, as a means of release.

He wrapped His arms around me and held me so tightly, so very tightly. He kissed my head and stroked my hair. He gently rocked me in His arms. With emotion in His voice, He remarked how incredible and special i was. He told me how He had longed to find someone who enjoyed their submission to such an extent, and who understood Him so completely.

In that moment, i felt so loved, so wanted and so utterly submissive.

SG left me in the sleep sack for some time after and i lay there floating, completely chilled out from the intensity of the session. He lay beside me to observe and smile at me, and stroke my hair.

The time after this is all rather hazy, but at some point He released me from the sleep sack. He rewarded me with a few orgasms, after handing me the Hitachi wand, as He looked on to watch His exhausted but very happy pet. After that and with the removal of my catsuit and pants, i guess we curled up and drifted off to sleep, once SG had secured me with my usual night-time attire of my cuffs and chains.

By far, this has to be one of the most intense things i've ever experienced in BDSM. Breath play is a huge rush, there's no doubt in that, but should NEVER be taken lightly. The trust between us is of utmost importance in our play.

Recently it feels like i have stepped up another level in my submission. my journey with SG continues on a deeper and more intense path... and i want to keep climbing (after all, we've got all that green rope to use).