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Monday, December 29, 2008



So, Master and i stayed up all night last night. We just snuggled, He held me, and we talked about what needed a little fixing schedule wise. There was no "i don't get this" or "you don't do that" from either of us. We both cherish every minute that we do get together, but we both have needs that are going unmet. Some of these needs we can provide each other... and some we can't. It was a wonderful talk, and it really helped close the gap we had both been feeling. We played a little after K got up to watch the kids, and even though it wasn't long or intense, it was needed. We both felt the energy exchange happen, and we both feel fairly content.

One of the needs I have is for a "big sister". I am not at all trying to replace my sweet kitten... i'm actually trying to improve myself for her. I cherish my role as her big sister. I ache to comfort her, guide her, and be with her. She is one of the very few women I want sexually, and she is a safe zone for me. She needs this from me, and I'm more than happy to provide it. However, in order for me to provide it, I need someone to provide something similar for me. I don't want another sexual partner... I don't want another sister slave... and I don't want someone taking my time or attention away from my family... but I do want a big sister. I've always had a need for a female figure that I can be "little" with. Someone who understands and will nurture. I have that, in a sense, with my best friend C, but she lives about a thousand miles away. I need someone here. This need is starting to impede on my ability to provide for Kit. Its a need that Master and Kit can't fill. I believe everyone has needs that their partner(s) can't fill... luckily thats my only one. I believe my slavery is starting to suffer because of this.

Life is good. Not perfect, but definitely good. There is nothing major that I would change... nothing I regret or feel resentful about. I am, for the most part, a content girl.

And that is one of the biggest blessings I could ever ask for...